Tuesday, October 18, 2011

I'm A Red

THE COLOR CODE


Definitely Red

Congratulations, Kristen, you are a RED personality. The Core Motivation that drives you through life is "Power". Power means the ability to get things done, to go from A to B as quickly and directly as possible. The word power was derived from the Old French poeir meaning "to be able." Often what is perceived by the other colors as insensitive is simply a pragmatic sense of urgency to accomplish a given task.
As a RED you naturally seek productivity and want others to see you as intellectually strong. As REDS want their own way, you like to be in the driver's seat and are willing to pay the price to be in a leadership role even in an intimate relationship. However, you can get frustrated when your partner cannot think for himself or make intelligent decisions on his own. As a RED, you tend to value whatever gets you ahead in life, whether it is at work, school, or in your personal relationships. What you value, you get done. You may be a workaholic and enjoy it!. You will, however, resist being forced to do anything that doesn't interest you.
As a RED, Kristen, you like to be right. You value approval from others for your intelligence and solution-based, pragmatic style. You want to be respected even more than you want to be loved, and you appreciate admiration for your logical, practical mind.

WHY YOU'RE HOT
Nobody Dates Like A Red
This is true. When you are in pursuit of something (or somebody!), you tend to go all out. You dress to impress, you get the limo, the tickets, the flowers, the reservations, and the whole shebang. You by nature are a very competitive opponent to any other potential suitor who may come along, and you take great pleasure in taking home the prize.


You Are Highly Protective Of Your Companion
When you commit to someone, they can feel your protection on all levels. You see them as part of you, and are willing to go to war verbally and even physically on their behalf. You will not back down or remain silent when your partner is being attacked. Your companion loves to know that he is being taken care of and that you will be there to back him up and defend him whenever necessary.




YOUR NEEDS


You Need Respect
As a RED, you naturally want to be respected. In fact, it may be more important to you to be respected than loved. You also need for your partner to be worthy (and if needs be, demanding) of your respect. How can you love what you can't respect? You appreciate your partner more if they demand your respect than simply allow you free license to walk all over them.


You Need To Appear Knowledgeable
ou value your intellectual and logic-based abilities. You consider your ability to reason and problem-solve to be one of your greatest attributes. You want your partner to value this about you as well and to promote this image to others. If your partner were to ever embarrass you publicly, you would have a hard time ever getting over it.




YOUR WANTS


You Want To Tightly Hide Your Insecurities
You feel insecure about your various inadequacies, and feel powerless when such things are exposed. Therefore, it is your tendency to guard those feelings of insecurity and inadequacy very tightly even from your significant other. This is not always appropriate, and you should find someone with whom you are able to open your heart and be vulnerable to so that you learn to value yourself for who you are and not solely by what you are able to produce.


You Want Your Productivity To Be Supported
REDS want to be productive, and you are no exception. You feel you are at your best when you are able to accomplish various goals. It is important that you find someone who allows you the time and the space that you need to continue to produce and do what you do best.








Yep that sounds about right!

Monday, October 17, 2011

Randomosity!

A few updates... seeing as how I do have writers block here lately.


Family:
Family life is pretty great :) My nana is out of the hospital and doing great for an almost 90 year old lady! Grammy is doing great too! We had a scare with her health. Doctors thought she might have cancer. And we are proud to report she is in fact cancer free! This week is my Pawpaw's birthday. He's such a wonderful man. He and my Mawmaw married when I was very young, and he took on an entire family. He's been a blessing to all of us. And he loves my grandmother (who is precious to my heart) unconditionally. So we're pretty excited to celebrate him :)

Friends:
Friends are also pretty great! I've been spending a good amount of time with friends and I'm loving it :)
I finally feel happy and content with that part of my life.

Work:
Work is going fantastic! We have opened so many accounts and kept them open! Our bank is running a campaign right now where the branches get a certain amount of money for the amount of accounts we open and so far we have $500 and counting! Oh and not to mention we are the ONLY branch who had exceeded all of our goals for the year! Um high five please?

Living Situation:
WE HAVE A HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!! Okay so a town house but same difference right?
It is absolutely adorable! It has a ton of updates, all new appliances, fresh paint, and it comes with a washer dryer and a grill! Let me just say, I'm in love with the place! I'll post pictures of it once we start getting stuff set up in it!



Oh and did I mention my Tigers are 7-0

W H A T T T T T T !!!!!!

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Chains

Today, I feel released.


I have had such a burden on my heart about so many things in my past. About my mom, my dad, my walk with God. Just so much has been heavy no my heart and its been literally tearing me down. But its so amazing to me how God can put just the right person, with just the right words to say or things to do, at exactly the right time to make you "wake up" and see what's going on.

If you all can remember, I told you about J, my very dear friend who had the boating accident.
Well before her, I was so lost. I was headed down a very dark and very scary path. I had lost my way with God and was trying to face the world alone. I was going out, partying, drinking, and just being a complete fool. I was "living in the world". Then when that happened to her, it scared me to death. Losing a friend can make anyone terrified. She was my "wake up call" Even with all that had happened to her, even with her and her mom both being out of work, struggling with finances, even with all the pain and recovery she was facing, J held her head high because of her unwavering faith that God would come through and provide for her and her family. She wasn't scared a bit. She knew God would take care of her and she knew that all of this was happening to her because God had a plan for it.

It was truly amazing to see this. Never before in my life had I experienced someone being that faithful. I mean I'm not saying there aren't people in my life that have the same unwavering faith and strong walk with the Lord, this was just the first time I had experienced it first hand and really paid attention. God used what happened to her to work in my life. I fought tooth and nail with him for so long. And then this happened and I woke up and realized what I had been missing. Instead of trying to face the world alone I had realized nothing was possible without God. I just needed to have faith that he would take care of me in every situation, no matter how hard it may seem. "The good Lord gives us mountains so we can learn how to climb"

After that day, September 12, 2011, I knew I needed to get God back in my life. But then the devil came back and attacked my heart once again. He kept telling me how unworthy I was of God's love and how I had to fix myself and my life before I could come back to him. I had to get right before I could come back to church. And for the last month, that's exactly how I've been feeling.

Then today, I was at lunch with my family and my grandmother wanted to take me to my dad's gravesite to put the fall flowers out with her and to just talk a llittle bit about him. She knew I had been struggling with anger issues as far as losing him. So she wanted to try to help me feel a little more at ease about everything. And as we were out there talking about him, she told me stories about how other people would come to her and tell her about how amazing and caring and giving my father was. How he was just so loving and such an honest man. How he had christian ethics even though he fell short of the glory of God so many times. And she said "It's sad to say it took losing your father and having others tell me he was a good man for me to really see the good in him. But sometimes when someone hurts you so much it's hard to see any good in them at all. But I want you to know, you need to see that no matter what someone may do to hurt you, there is some good in everyone."-in this referring to my parents.

For such a long time I have been fighting with my mom. The relationship I've had with her has been rocky my whole life. I've had such a resentment towards her. Such a hatred towards her. I blamed her for everything that went wrong in my life. I was just so let down by her. I felt so betrayed. I just couldn't see how there was a good person in her at all. Then hearing my grandmother saying this, it all became clear to me. My mother isn't a bad person. She just has allowed satan to put demons in her life. She's allowed those demons to take over her. But deep down, she is a good person somewhere. And the only way for me to truly find peace with her is to find that good.

Then we continued on to talk about where I was in my life, and how I had let those burdens of my mom and dad take over me and brought demons into my life. How I had allowed the ill feelings towards my mom and the anger at losing my dad turn me against God and put me down the wrong path. But that I wanted to let it all go. I wanted to come back to God. But I just didn't feel like I could come back to him until I had let my demons go. But then saying that, I realized how stupid I sounded saying that out loud. And I remembered something my preacher said one day in a sermon.
"You don't get your life right to come to God, you come to God to get your life right"

All of a sudden it just felt like all the chains I had were lifted. I felt so free finally. I felt like the holes I had in my life were gone and all the sadness and the loneliness I had were replaced with peace.  I finally knew what it meant to "let go and let God".
I finally realized what it meant for me to be a christian, and what it was God wanted me to do.

It feels so liberating. And it also feels so good to be able to post this and finally get off my chest so many things that I've had buried so far down in my soul. I'm so grateful for all that God has done in my life and for all the people he has brought around me. I am so thankful for all the prayers people have had for me thus far. And I continue to ask for prayers, for they have been such a blessing!

Play Pretty <3


Kristen

Friday, October 7, 2011

Somebody's Chelsea

Met an old man yesterday
Next to me on a westbound plane
He said "I was married sixty years
I swear it feels like she's still here."
Then he took out a picture

Staring at that black and white
The tears filled up in his eyes
I said "You were a lucky man."
He said "I feel like I still am."

When he told me her name
I heard myself say...

I wanna be Somebody's Chelsea
Somebody's world
Somebody's day and night
One and only girl
A part of a love story
That never has an end
You know that's what every woman wants to be
Somebody's Chelsea

He made me laugh when he talked about
Their first date and her father's doubts
He said "Even as her hair turned gray,
She still took my breath away."
And that it never changed with time
That's when I closed my eyes

I wanna be Somebody's Chelsea
Somebody's world
Somebody's day and night
One and only girl
A part of a love story
That never has an end
You know that's what every woman wants to be
Somebody's Chelsea

................................................................................................................................................

Last night RH and I had a great talk. It was one of those that makes you really think.
Somehow we got on the topic of what we want out of life as far as relationships go.
If you couldn't tell from my last post, I've been hurt multiple a few times as has he.
So we're both somewhat skeptical about getting into another relationship. Hence the "taking it slow" approach we're taking with this. Anyways, I told him that my multitude of bad luck with men doesnt come from me being "scared of commitment" like most people think. It's that I know what I want and deserve and I refuse to settle. And he agreed. But then the question was asked, "Well since you know, what do you want?"

He told me all about how he wants a woman who is trustworthy and that he can be comfortable with.
But then I started to really think about what I wanted. For the longest time I thought I knew exactly what I wanted. And I thought it was simple, love me, be honest with me, and dont cheat. I mean how hard is that?
But then I REALLY thought about it, and I want so much more than that. It's still simple what I want.
I want to be "somebody's chelsea" as the song above says. It's Reba's new song and it just put into words exactly what I was thinking.

It's a song about an older man who has lost his wife, but he is still so in love with her. She was his partner, his best friend, his love, his wife, his children's mother, his grandchildren's grandmother, his life, his world, his everything.

I want that. I look at my parents who have been together for about twenty years. They are just so madly in love still after all this time. It's beautiful. They are just so comfortable together. They know everything there is to no about each other. They're still affectionate towards each other. They're still so goofy together. They still know how to make each other smile. The biggest signs of love that made me realize "that's what I want" when I watch them was when his father passed away. She knew exactly what he needed from her. She knew not to say anything but to just hold his hand. When he cried she knew not to look at him. She was so strong for him but at the same time compassionate for him. And then when her grandmother passed a few months ago he was strong for her. He knew when she needed to be held and when she just needed to hold his hand. He knew when to be close and when to let her be. It's just so awesome to see the two of them together.
Not to mention the fact that they're amazing parents. I know sometimes we clash but all in all I wouldnt trade them for the world. They're great role models. And even if I didn't always like or understand their rules growing up, I know now that they're doing it in the best interest of me. They're there for us kids when we need them. They tell us no when we need it. They laugh with us and hang out with us, but they also know when to draw the line. They give advice but they know when to not say anything at all. They're the most amazing people I know
^^if you're reading this, its from the heart not a kiss up lol^^

That's what I want in a relationship. I want to have that closeness where there just isn't another person in the world. I want to have a best friend but the love of a lifetime. I want someone who will love me all the days of my life. Someone who will still think I'm beautiful with grey hair. Someone who will be a good father to my kids. Someone who will protect me. Someone who understands me even when I'm being weird. Someone who knows when to hold me and when to just let me be. Someone who sets my heart on fire everytime I see them. Someone who can give me butterflies even after 20/40/60+ years. Someone who tears up when they see me walk down the aisle at our wedding. I want someone who loves me unconditionally. Someone who keeps my best interest at heart always.

When I find him, I'll marry him. Promise you that :)

What do you want?

Play Pretty <3

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Lemonade

Just the other day I was at my cousin Val's house
And her friend SB was over.
She told me about how her boyfriend broke up with her
Because she wouldn't "give into him" if you know what I'm saying.

When she told me that she told him no because she wasn't ready
you can imagine how freaking ecstatic I was!
I told her how proud I was of her for making that decision and it was nothing to be ashamed of.
If anything he should be ashamed for acting so childish.
But she was just so upset because she "thought they'd be together forever"
She is only 14.

Hearing her talk about it, and asking my advice about what to do
made me think about all of my not so lovely ex's.
How  I was "so in love" and how we were going to "be together forever"
And then fate turned and things ended.
And how upset I was every time because I thought life was just over.
But having this conversation with her made me recap on all of them and then think of where they are now.
And truth be told
"some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers"
Is probably the truest statement I've ever heard.
I am so glad it never worked out with me and any of them.
Now, in all fairness, they aren't all bad.
Some of them are terrific people.
Just not for me.

So let's do a slight recap of different guys that I've dated and where they are now.

7th grade is where the "boy craze" started.
All through middle school I would only "date" two guys.
One of which is a "thug" and on drugs.
The other has been in a mental institution.

i kid you not.

Then in highschool in no particular order I dated a few wackos.
One guy was a bit older than me. He now has a baby with a girl who hates him and lives with his parents.
Another guy I dated is strung out on all kind of drugs. He also has a baby by some girl.
Three guys I dated joined the military and are now married.
All three of these are amazing guys and they have gorgeous, sweet wives!
Then there was the psycho who told me he would kill me when I dumped him.
Let's just say that didn't end to well for him.
One of the guys who was a football player "stud' type of guy is now married, working at wendy's, and has a HUGE beer belly.
Oh and another guy I dated has a lovely beer belly he's sporting around too.
Then there's the guy I had THE biggest crush on in 9th grade... He's a hair dresser.
I also dated/liked a few sweet guys.
One of which in particular stands out in my head.
He's an awesome guy and such a sweetie.
He went to The Citadel and is making great things out of his life :)
Then there's the "high school sweetheart"
Let's just say, great guy, not so great together.

Post Highschool I've only had two relationships.
One was a train wreck.
He isn't a bad guy but he is a terrible boyfriend.
He's moved on and is doing great things with his life.
Then there was the engagement.
Bless him.
That man is the sweetest, caring, loving, most amazing man I think I've ever met.
But just something about the relationship just wasn't meant to be.

Needless to say I haven't had very good luck in the relationship department.
But then again if you think about it I have.
They may not have been the greatest but they helped shape me into who I am today.
And I'm so blessed for all the things I've learned about life and about myself through these relationships.
And I'm perfectly happy with where I am now.
I'm glad everything turned out the way it did.
And I made sure to tell SB these lovely stories.
We all shared a good laugh about it but I hope it helped ease her pain as well.

Even though relationships end and we think it's the end of the world and life is over,
God has a reason and a plan behind it.
So just put your faith and trust in him that you'll get through it.
And one day you'll thank him that he let it happen to you.

"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade"



Play Pretty
Kristen

Bloggy Life

So in case you haven't noticed, my little blog here is somewhat plain. I mean it's cute but it's so very "standard" I guess you could so. In other words it's just not me at all. And while reading some of my favorite blogs BEAUtiful Mess and All In My Twenties, I have found that you're blog desing has to be anything but boring when it comes to having a successful blog. It has to completely resemble you seeing as how it is all about you.

So I took their advice and searched high and low trying to find a blog design that represented me, and of course was cute! And for a while none of the designs I found really stood out to me.

Then today, while reading God Grace and Grits, I can across something marvelous :)




I was in love! All of her designs are so beautiful and super affordable! You better believe I purchased one as soon as I could! She is fantastic! And she puts an "about me" part on there so you're not just buying stuff from a stranger. That was awesome because no other designers have done that that I've seen. I'm going to be working with her the next few days to get the final design and it will be coming to you soon :)

Stay Tuned and

Play Pretty <3
Kristen

Monday, October 3, 2011

OH.MY.WORD.

Let me just start by saying.....WOW what a Monday!
It has been crazy hectic busy at work so far today and the day is only halfway over!
(But I do thank the good Lord for it because that just means JOB SECURITY!)

Anyways, my weekend was ahhhhhh-mazing :)


CLEMSON TIGERS:
ohhhhhhhhhhhhh yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh
23-3
vs. Virginia Tech?
love.love.love



Anywho, I had an absolutely amazing weekend :)
I could not believe how completely perfect it went!
Friday, RH (new guy) went out again to one of my absolute favorite local restaurants Nishie G's.
Never a disappointment :) I'm pretty sure I have him hooked on it now!
Then we OF COURSE watched Transformers 3, because I mean, let's face it, action packed movie, comedy, advanced robots, and Josh Duhamel are all the elements needed for a perfect movie!

Saturday I woke up at 4 am, again I say, 4 AM. I went to the "Race For The Cure" in downtown Charlotte, raising money and awareness for breast cancer with the Susan G. Komen foundation. It was breathtaking. It was very emotional to see all the women with "survivor" shirts on. And all the participants had tags that said "in memory of..." for lost loved ones and "in celebration of...." for survivors. It was beautiful. At the very end they had a few of the survivors speak and then they had a balloon release. Every survivor gets one pink balloon for every year they've been cancer free. It's amazing to see. I'll definitely be decking out in Pink every October from here on out and participating in it! Later on Saturday RH, J, her bf and I all had a bonfire and roasted hot dogs, it was an AWESOME way to kick off fall!

Sunday, I went and spent most of the day with my daddy's family, man how I love them!
Then later on J, her bf, RH and I all roasted marshmellows :) It was so cute! I always have a blast with them!

I also got some amazingly great news this past weekend! One of my absolute best friends AA told me her lease was running out at the end of October and she was looking to move into a new apartment, which in case you've forgotten, Kristen needs a roommate like ASAP. AA and I tried to move into an apartment together (which we've talked about since 7th grade) but I had an unstable job at the time so we decided to wait it out and she signed her lease for another year. Well now that I have my big girl job, moving out is possible :) So I was talking to her the other day, telling her about how my plans on moving out had fallen through with V. Come to find out, her lease is out after October! I have a four day weekend at the end of October, we already have an apartment in the works and we're moving in together at the end of the month! I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO excited I can't even put it into words!

The good Lord definitely works wonders and I am so blessed for all the good things he is bringing into my life here lately!

Hope everyone has a fabulous Monday

Play Pretty <3
Kristen